Hiking along a trail last weekend in the woods, I was intrigued by a lone evergreen in the middle of the forest of other trees. I swear I had not seen another one like it the entire hike. There it was, just standing alone of its kind, like a neon sign. I felt a smirk come across my face and my best friend immediately picked up on it and inquired…”you’re gonna write about it aren’t you? “ I said “Im not sure but definitely wanna take a pic and let it marinate a bit.” He quickly obliged me and took one for me. I knew I would write at some point, just had no idea what exactly, as I always wait for God to lead.
Have you ever stood alone? It can look a lot of different ways. Have you ever had to stand for yourself, with someone, or for something? Have you ever felt alone in a crowded room? Where you are surrounded by amazing people but still feel like you are alone. Its not because of lack of effort, it’s because the things happening in your head and heart feel so contrast to what anyone around you may comprehend. You may be standing alone because you know its right simply from an integrity stand point. It doesn’t mean you don’t love, its simply means you will not allow yourself or others to be left vulnerable, used, scapegoated, disrespected…etc…whatever fits a plethora of situations.
Maybe in your situation you were forced to stand alone. In that standing you felt the emptiness of space, the deafening silence that echos into the eardrums of your souls core. The excruciating pain of abandonment, rejection, or discovering that instead of ever being a priority to someone you were simply an option. You then had to make a decision to either allow the weight of it to fold you into mental depletion, or to fight to stand and remember who you were created to be, and to learn and heal.
There are so many scenarios of “standing alone”. It can look a lot of different ways. Whether it be a situation you chose or didn’t, there is always something to be learned, and growth that can occur from it.
A long time friend commented to me a couple weeks ago after a brief exchange, “Our God is sometimes the only raft left to hang on to, as it should be”.
Jesus stood alone many times.
Do you remember early in Jesus’ ministry when he and his new disciples were in Capernaum? He had just endeared himself to Peter by healing the fisherman’s mother-in-law. The sick and demon possessed were being set free. The book of Mark says that “the whole town gathered at the door.” By all accounts, it was a great night.
Early the next morning, Jesus snuck out to pray alone. Reading into his motives a bit, I think he understood the temptation to go with the crowd. So he pulled away for perspective. To have a conversation with the Father.
His solitude was cut short by Peter and his friends exclaiming, essentially, “What the heck are you doing? Everyone is looking for you! You should get back and keep doing miracles like yesterday!”
But Jesus made a different decision. That time alone gave him discernment and courage to stand alone, even from his closest friends. He risked being misunderstood to choose what was right and best.
James 1:12
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.
In the various forms of standing alone we can easily feel unseen. We quickly notice the ones who are no longer around. Those we no longer hear from. Its possible that the “scenery” has changed as seasons do, but its doesn’t mean we are fully alone. This evergreen is alone of its kind but surrounded by various other, striving to grow , trees who are also trying to live and grow and thrive. Sometimes we focus so much on who we think isn’t standing with us that we miss the treasure of the ones right in front of us who are. Sometimes the forest feels so thick, that as the old saying goes….. we “can’t see the forest for the trees”.
We also need to remember the truth is that God sees us. He knows your every thought, every tear, every beat of your heart. In Him you are never alone.
Standing, in and of itself, is hard but when it feels combined with “alone” it can be excruciating. I imagine and cringe at Jesus crucifixion and the agony of being separated from the Father. Place yourself there for a minute. Wow.
Whatever your season, let me challenge you to take a good hard look at your forest surrounding you. Although your circumstance may be different than anyone you know, and nobody can fully understand exactly how you feel, there are still those God has strategically placed and kept in your life for such a time as this. You may feel like the only one of your kind but that doest mean your root system isn’t being supported by those around you (do a study on how tree systems support one another). We simply need to look below the surface to see it more clearly. The people who truly love you, you will not only know them by their fruits, but also their roots.
I have “Be Still -Exodus 14:14” tattooed on my left wrist and “Breathe- Exodus 33:14” tattooed on my right forearm. Both tattoos mean something deeply to me because its my reminder in my anxious “standing alone” moments to always refocus on Him. Seeking Him First, above all else. He will provide what or who is needed. The enemy would love to ingrain in your brain that you are fully alone and abandoned, but God says differently. We need to trust His Word, and His truth. Reminding myself this day.
Isaiah 41:10
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand
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