What is the first thing that runs through your mind if someone were to approach you, and ask you about going into a prison voluntarily?? Yes, I said VOLUNTARILY, to spend the day with convicts.
The first image in my head, of course, was what I have seen on television or movies: Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile, Escape from Alcatraz. The imagination can certainly run wild can't it??
Especially being a woman going into a mens' prison, it was easy for me to conjure up all kinds of thoughts in my head equalling to= "NO WAY HOSEA!!"
For four years I have been approached by a man from our church who is head of a prison ministry. He has tried repeatedly to convince me to come and be involved along with my husband. My husband Tim has been a part of this ministry for several years, going on average of 3 times per month, and has not been able to convince me to go and be a part of such an endeavor. My attitude about this was "This is YOUR calling, not mine, so go right ahead...without me".
In an earlier post I talked about being delivered, several years ago, from the spirit of fear and how, even though. I was delivered, it doesn't mean I never deal with fearful thoughts. I still have to hold every thought captive, in an attempt to cast out the fearful ones, as not to get myself in the same boat I was in before.
Year after year I have been presented with the opportunity of going to the prison, yet I was not able to get past the fear of what I had conjured up in my head. I didn't even want to entertain the idea.
Every year, the prison has a celebration for the prisoners and they are each given a tray of Christmas cookies, and can join in the Christmas celebration and service that is put on by various volunteers. This year was no different. My ever so faithful friend, Glen, approached me again, as he always does this time of year, and asked me to be a part, but this time, something was different. I didn't say "yes" right away, but I didn't say "no" either.....I said, "I will get back to you". I knew in my heart the Lord wanted me to go, but yet, I was still fighting with those thoughts in my head of everything that could go wrong. Although the Christmas party celebration would be similar as in years past, it was different in the fact that I also had the opportunity to be a part of the worship team that went to do praise and worship music during the service for the prisoners. Now if you know me personally, you know that singing, being part of the praise and worship team, and pouring out my heart to God in song is a huge burning desire in my heart. Its where the Lord has been calling me for years, to sing, to lead, to give everything I am to Him through voice. There is not one ounce of me that could even begin to deny this call any longer, after I had turned my back on it for so many years. Because of that burning desire,I admit, having the opportunity to be part of the team doing the praise and worship that I was "hooked". There was no way, if I could help it, that I was going to miss a chance to let God use me in this way, even if it WAS at the prison. Did my fear of being at the prison vanish? NO, but somehow being able to be a part of something I so deeply desired, was the spoon full of sugar I needed to swallow those thoughts of fear and flush them right out. I now know that God used that "God given desire" in my heart as HIS "hook" to get me in that place that I had feared for so many years. Somehow by Gods grace, I was able to let the guard down that fear had been holding up in my life, in this area. By doing this I was able to look at God and freely say "Ok, here I am Lord, use me".
As we arrived that day at the prison and prepared to go through security checks, I remember being nervous, and clinging to my husbands arm. I remember him giving me the look to let me know it would be fine. After the security screening when I left with my Worship Team "Brothers" to go and set up equipment, I remember feeling excited and glad that I was with them. I knew God was going to do something that day....I could feel it in all of us. After things were set up and we got rolling, I watched 200 prisoners file their way in, get their tray of cookies and have a seat in front of us for the first set. It was evident to me, that even though some men may not have been overjoyed to be there, they were at least curious as to what they might see. Some of their attitudes were indifferent and some excited. I remember thinking, in a bit of my nervousness as they stared on, -"ok Lord, its all you, I alone have nothin!"
Before I knew it, we had done two sets of about 4 hours total, for 400 men, along with watching the Holy Spirit move through the testimonies of friends Rob and Ron. From my best recollection, 18 men were saved that day and the Holy Spirit was all over that room - thick!! I still do not even have the words to explain what happened that day. I can tell you that personally I went expecting to be used by the Holy Spirit, but I never expected to get majorly blessed in the process. I can tell you that my life was changed, and my heart was changed in so many different ways. I experienced love, compassion, healing in my own heart, a confidence of the Lord, and thankfulness. A thankfulness of my own, that I had NOT allowed the enemy to win my mind over with fear that kept me from coming in the past. I watched God work in the lives of some of these men right there, just by seeing the expression change on their faces. Barriers were over thrown, walls taken down, forgiveness toward others and themselves. Lives were changed, there is no doubt, and words could not even begin to describe the experience that day. Although we stood there in a prison, the chains fell off of many that day and many experienced a new sense of freedom, including me.
This experience has changed my heart so much toward prison ministry that I have found myself wishing I could go with my husband when he goes during the week, along with me already committing to go again next Christmas season. It just goes to show that God is able to do more that anything we could possibly imagine ever. He is amazing!!
"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably MORE than all we ask or imagine, according to HIS power that is at work within us; to HIM be glory....forever and ever! Amen." Eph. 3:20-21
Friday, January 28, 2011
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Happy Birthday!!!!
Its been nearly nine years ago that I met my husband Tim. It definately was a time in my life where I was very weary and protective of my heart since I had just lost my husband Todd a year before. I remember when we met I was very nervous as we got to know one another, not sure I was even ready to date again by the time he finally asked me out, but I stepped out in faith. I remember God telling me all along that He promised "He would be faithful".
Looking back, I remember just a few months after my husband Todd had died and I had a friend mention to me about "getting out there and dating". I remember how angry it made me, and how I took it out on God. I remember yelling to God that "I would NEVER marry again!", let alone date. I told Him that if He had other plans that He would have to change my heart because I wasnt gonna do it! I then made, what I thought, an impossible list of qualities that I felt "Mr. Right" would have to possess. I then slammed the journal shut as if to make my point clear to God. It was then for the first time I heard Him say.."I promise that I will be faithful".
Tim and I have been married now for 5 1/2 years. It has not been a "cake walk" for either of us. It has and will continue to be a lot of hard work, like most great marriages take. We have had our share of ups and downs, but Praise God, we keep walkin it out. :) My sweet husband, who was 39 when he married for the first time, became not only a husband, but a father to Kennedy and also took on anything we both brought into the marriage, even though we were unaware. We both had a lot of growing to do as individuals and together. We have so far to go even yet, but through all we have walked I can see how beautiful my husband is, not to mention what a great Dad he is. I love how I can look at him and see where he once was and where he is now. There is soooo much more I could say, but what I am getting at it that I am married to a pretty amazing guy. I can see the amazing man of God he is, and is working to become, and where God is going to take him as he walks in obedience. I am so blessed to have him in my life, words cannot even begin to express. Oh, and the list I made and threw at God way back,.......every quality I asked for, I got - EVERY ONE!! He would be the first to tell you he is not perfect, but he is perfect for me....and God WAS faithful....just as He promised.
So Happy Birthday Tim on January 16th!! I know I dont tell you often enough, but I think you are pretty amazing, and I thank God for your leadership, your wisdom and your patience. I love you!
Looking back, I remember just a few months after my husband Todd had died and I had a friend mention to me about "getting out there and dating". I remember how angry it made me, and how I took it out on God. I remember yelling to God that "I would NEVER marry again!", let alone date. I told Him that if He had other plans that He would have to change my heart because I wasnt gonna do it! I then made, what I thought, an impossible list of qualities that I felt "Mr. Right" would have to possess. I then slammed the journal shut as if to make my point clear to God. It was then for the first time I heard Him say.."I promise that I will be faithful".
Tim and I have been married now for 5 1/2 years. It has not been a "cake walk" for either of us. It has and will continue to be a lot of hard work, like most great marriages take. We have had our share of ups and downs, but Praise God, we keep walkin it out. :) My sweet husband, who was 39 when he married for the first time, became not only a husband, but a father to Kennedy and also took on anything we both brought into the marriage, even though we were unaware. We both had a lot of growing to do as individuals and together. We have so far to go even yet, but through all we have walked I can see how beautiful my husband is, not to mention what a great Dad he is. I love how I can look at him and see where he once was and where he is now. There is soooo much more I could say, but what I am getting at it that I am married to a pretty amazing guy. I can see the amazing man of God he is, and is working to become, and where God is going to take him as he walks in obedience. I am so blessed to have him in my life, words cannot even begin to express. Oh, and the list I made and threw at God way back,.......every quality I asked for, I got - EVERY ONE!! He would be the first to tell you he is not perfect, but he is perfect for me....and God WAS faithful....just as He promised.
So Happy Birthday Tim on January 16th!! I know I dont tell you often enough, but I think you are pretty amazing, and I thank God for your leadership, your wisdom and your patience. I love you!
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Home Court Advantage
Your team is down by a couple of points, with just a few minutes to go in the game. At this point, anything can happen. Have you ever been to a game where the encouragement of the crowd, the coach, or the teammates, to one another, have made the difference between winning and losing? I have been part of that exact scenario. When I was in college playing volleyball, I remember our coach teaching us about momentum. The team with the momentum would come out on top. Whenever we found ourselves without the momentum and going down fast, we knew it could come down to one play. This one play could then lead to a series of plays that could just steal the momentum from the other team so fast that they may not even know what happened. I watched this happen time and time again. Our coach would say "momentum" and we knew what had to come into motion, we had a choice to make. It didn't however, come down to just the play, it really started with encouragement. One word, comment, or gesture from one another, even the crowd, could make all the difference in the direction we were going. This change did not only potentially effected our attitudes, but the final outcome.
Have you ever known someone who believed in you? Someone who spoke words of encouragement and praise to you no matter what was happening in the present? The kind of person who made you feel like you could do it, whatever "it" was? Praise God, the Lord has blessed me with a small group of men and women in my life who do just that. These are people, that not only encourage me, but love me enough to talk straight with me honestly and openly. Trust plays a huge role in these relationships....just like it does on a team.
It is a well known fact among sports teams that anyone playing on their home court has the "home court advantage" because of all the "encouraging" that can take place by the home crowd. Before the contest even begins, they already have the advantage.
To me, it is the same in life, or should be. Maybe you have never been on a sports team, or have been a cheerleader in uniform....but what are you doing on YOUR home court??
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Ephesians 4:29).
As a parent, teacher, and coach I have watched the difference just a word of encouragement can make in my own children, or those I am working with. Its amazing to me what happens when you shine a bit of "sunshine" on what seems to be looking like a moment of gloom. With both my kids being young, just a simple "you can do it" or smile when they look to get approval, makes a huge difference in getting them to step out in faith and keep plugging away at the task at hand. Its like the "Little Engine that Could". If I tell my little engines they can do it...they at least start to step out with saying..."I think I can, I think I can" to "I know I can, I know I can". Sometimes all we need is a push "up the hill".
Adults are no different...at least I am not. I don't know anyone who hasn't needed encouragement on a regular basis, especially when facing something new, whether they would admit it or not, we all need it from time to time. That being said, let me ask you this tough question: Do you bring sunshine or gloom into the room? Let me be the first to say, especially after listening to the news on a daily basis, that there doesn't seem to be much sunshine in the world. You, however, can be the light in this gloomy world. Make your words a fountain of life. Be a positive person. Encourage one another.
The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life (Proverbs 10:11).
Although not always easy, I LOVE to encourage people. I thank God for the example of people in my life here in the last couple of years that have shown me " how its done". First thing to do is to immerse yourself in the Word of God and pray. Over time you will discover you CAN control the way you think, choosing to focus on some thoughts, and reject others. It also becomes easier to separate the "life and death voices: in your life. "Life voices" are those people who encourage you into your next season, "death voices" are those of the opposite. The great thing, is that you get to determine which ones you allow to have an influence in your life, because we all know that everyone has an opinion. :)
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if any-thing is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things (Philippians 4:8).
When you wake in the morning, ask God to help you focus on the positive and then hold every thought captive, rebuking the negative.
I personally, along with the Holy Spirits leading, look for ways to encourage people in a genuine manner, trying to speak and react in a positive manner. This is a daily, hourly, minute by minute path to try and stay on. I admit I have missed it many of times. I can tell you that by being an encourager on a regular basis brings unspeakable joy to my heart. I love people, and I love to love on them in any way possible....encouragement is one of my favorite ways to do it. God is always looking for willing vessels to use in this very way.
When someone comes to you with life's difficulties, do not respond with a "gloom and doom" attitude. Listen with compassion and avoid simplistic advice. Say something such as, "I know this is a tough time for you, but it won't last. Let me encourage you: God will see you through, and I'm here to help, too."
[God] comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God (2 Corinthians 1:4).
And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone (1 Thessalonians 5:14).
There is no question that being the giver or receiver of encouragement, can make all the difference in the world, it has mine. I have also watched it happen in the lives of others. Encouragement can completely change the momentum for the day of someone else, or how they may begin to look at their own circumstance. May I encourage you today to begin, or continue, to be the "sunshine" with your encouragement to others in your life by focusing on the the things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable. I pray that everyone who is around you, or gets the chance to cross your path may be made to feel as though they have the "home court advantage". God Blessings to you.
Have you ever known someone who believed in you? Someone who spoke words of encouragement and praise to you no matter what was happening in the present? The kind of person who made you feel like you could do it, whatever "it" was? Praise God, the Lord has blessed me with a small group of men and women in my life who do just that. These are people, that not only encourage me, but love me enough to talk straight with me honestly and openly. Trust plays a huge role in these relationships....just like it does on a team.
It is a well known fact among sports teams that anyone playing on their home court has the "home court advantage" because of all the "encouraging" that can take place by the home crowd. Before the contest even begins, they already have the advantage.
To me, it is the same in life, or should be. Maybe you have never been on a sports team, or have been a cheerleader in uniform....but what are you doing on YOUR home court??
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen (Ephesians 4:29).
As a parent, teacher, and coach I have watched the difference just a word of encouragement can make in my own children, or those I am working with. Its amazing to me what happens when you shine a bit of "sunshine" on what seems to be looking like a moment of gloom. With both my kids being young, just a simple "you can do it" or smile when they look to get approval, makes a huge difference in getting them to step out in faith and keep plugging away at the task at hand. Its like the "Little Engine that Could". If I tell my little engines they can do it...they at least start to step out with saying..."I think I can, I think I can" to "I know I can, I know I can". Sometimes all we need is a push "up the hill".
Adults are no different...at least I am not. I don't know anyone who hasn't needed encouragement on a regular basis, especially when facing something new, whether they would admit it or not, we all need it from time to time. That being said, let me ask you this tough question: Do you bring sunshine or gloom into the room? Let me be the first to say, especially after listening to the news on a daily basis, that there doesn't seem to be much sunshine in the world. You, however, can be the light in this gloomy world. Make your words a fountain of life. Be a positive person. Encourage one another.
The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life (Proverbs 10:11).
Although not always easy, I LOVE to encourage people. I thank God for the example of people in my life here in the last couple of years that have shown me " how its done". First thing to do is to immerse yourself in the Word of God and pray. Over time you will discover you CAN control the way you think, choosing to focus on some thoughts, and reject others. It also becomes easier to separate the "life and death voices: in your life. "Life voices" are those people who encourage you into your next season, "death voices" are those of the opposite. The great thing, is that you get to determine which ones you allow to have an influence in your life, because we all know that everyone has an opinion. :)
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if any-thing is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things (Philippians 4:8).
When you wake in the morning, ask God to help you focus on the positive and then hold every thought captive, rebuking the negative.
I personally, along with the Holy Spirits leading, look for ways to encourage people in a genuine manner, trying to speak and react in a positive manner. This is a daily, hourly, minute by minute path to try and stay on. I admit I have missed it many of times. I can tell you that by being an encourager on a regular basis brings unspeakable joy to my heart. I love people, and I love to love on them in any way possible....encouragement is one of my favorite ways to do it. God is always looking for willing vessels to use in this very way.
When someone comes to you with life's difficulties, do not respond with a "gloom and doom" attitude. Listen with compassion and avoid simplistic advice. Say something such as, "I know this is a tough time for you, but it won't last. Let me encourage you: God will see you through, and I'm here to help, too."
[God] comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God (2 Corinthians 1:4).
And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone (1 Thessalonians 5:14).
There is no question that being the giver or receiver of encouragement, can make all the difference in the world, it has mine. I have also watched it happen in the lives of others. Encouragement can completely change the momentum for the day of someone else, or how they may begin to look at their own circumstance. May I encourage you today to begin, or continue, to be the "sunshine" with your encouragement to others in your life by focusing on the the things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable. I pray that everyone who is around you, or gets the chance to cross your path may be made to feel as though they have the "home court advantage". God Blessings to you.
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Every Season
Today with all the snow we are getting, made me think of the song below by Nicole Nordeman. I am not really a fan of the snow anymore. I only really deal with it because I have to. I really didn't mind it as much when we had snowmobiles and I had an excuse to really get out...because I love snowmobiles. Other than that, I could do without it. It made me however think about this song and how when God bring us through seasons of our lives...no matter where we walk or what we have done...its a process of growth, a process of seeing the bigger picture of just who He is and who We are in HIM, and that His promises never fail - EVER!
***********************************************************************************
Every Season by Nicole Nordeman
Every evening sky an invitation
to trace the pattern stars
and early in July a celebration
for freedom that is ours
and I notice You in children's games
in those who watch them from the shade
every drop of sun is full of fun
and wonder
You are summer
And even when the trees have just
surrendered to the harvest time
forfeiting their leaves in late September and
sending us inside
still I notice You when change begins
and I embraced four colder winds
I will offer thanks for what has been
and what's to come
You are autumn
and everything in time and under heaven
finally falls asleep
wrapped in blankets white
all creation shivers underneath
and still I notice You when branches crack
and in my breath on frosted grass
even now in death You open doors
for life to enter
You are winter
and everything that's new has bravely surfaced
teaching us to breathe
what was frozen through is newly purposed
turning all things green
so it is with You
and how You make me new
with every season's change
and so it will be as You are re-creating me
summer
autumn
winter
spring
**********************************************************************************
Ecclesaistes 3:1-22 (NIV 2010)
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What do workers gain from their toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet[a] no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him.
15 Whatever is has already been,
and what will be has been before;
and God will call the past to account.[b]
16 And I saw something else under the sun:
In the place of judgment—wickedness was there,
in the place of justice—wickedness was there.
17 I said to myself,
“God will bring into judgment
both the righteous and the wicked,
for there will be a time for every activity,
a time to judge every deed.”
18 I also said to myself, “As for humans, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. 19 Surely the fate of human beings is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath[c]; humans have no advantage over animals. Everything is meaningless. 20 All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return. 21 Who knows if the human spirit rises upward and if the spirit of the animal goes down into the earth?”
22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a person than to enjoy their work, because that is their lot. For who can bring them to see what will happen after them?
***********************************************************************************
Every Season by Nicole Nordeman
Every evening sky an invitation
to trace the pattern stars
and early in July a celebration
for freedom that is ours
and I notice You in children's games
in those who watch them from the shade
every drop of sun is full of fun
and wonder
You are summer
And even when the trees have just
surrendered to the harvest time
forfeiting their leaves in late September and
sending us inside
still I notice You when change begins
and I embraced four colder winds
I will offer thanks for what has been
and what's to come
You are autumn
and everything in time and under heaven
finally falls asleep
wrapped in blankets white
all creation shivers underneath
and still I notice You when branches crack
and in my breath on frosted grass
even now in death You open doors
for life to enter
You are winter
and everything that's new has bravely surfaced
teaching us to breathe
what was frozen through is newly purposed
turning all things green
so it is with You
and how You make me new
with every season's change
and so it will be as You are re-creating me
summer
autumn
winter
spring
**********************************************************************************
Ecclesaistes 3:1-22 (NIV 2010)
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What do workers gain from their toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet[a] no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him.
15 Whatever is has already been,
and what will be has been before;
and God will call the past to account.[b]
16 And I saw something else under the sun:
In the place of judgment—wickedness was there,
in the place of justice—wickedness was there.
17 I said to myself,
“God will bring into judgment
both the righteous and the wicked,
for there will be a time for every activity,
a time to judge every deed.”
18 I also said to myself, “As for humans, God tests them so that they may see that they are like the animals. 19 Surely the fate of human beings is like that of the animals; the same fate awaits them both: As one dies, so dies the other. All have the same breath[c]; humans have no advantage over animals. Everything is meaningless. 20 All go to the same place; all come from dust, and to dust all return. 21 Who knows if the human spirit rises upward and if the spirit of the animal goes down into the earth?”
22 So I saw that there is nothing better for a person than to enjoy their work, because that is their lot. For who can bring them to see what will happen after them?
Monday, January 3, 2011
Intimacy
When I started this blog because of God's beckoning me to do so...I knew it was going to force me to be more of an open book than I already am. I like to think I am a pretty open person anyway. My thought is, that if God gets the glory for anything I share then its ALL GOOD, and nothing else matters.
Awhile ago a dear friend of mine taught me a song by Kari Jobe. The song is called "The More I Seek You". We were preparing for a prayer conference and to lead praise and worship music at the start of it. One of the songs we did together was this one. I was immediately drawn to the song, and shared so with him. He then told me that it also was a song that struck a chord deeply in his heart. He then shared an intimate story taking him back to when his boys were young and they used to climb on his lap to get some Daddy time. In my heart I began to ache because that was something I always desired with my biological father. It's not that I hadn't ever sat on my fathers lap, but it was the deep father-daughter connection I desired that was lacking with us (due to issues in his own life)...something that has affected my whole life resulting instead in the feelings of rejection and abandonment on certain levels.
After the practice for the conference, that song became ingrained so deeply in my soul that when I went to sleep that night I felt I was still singing it in my spirit...as if I never went gone to sleep, but yet I had. I woke up singing it as well. When the day of the conference came and we sang that particular song, the anointing of the Holy Spirit was so thick on the platform I could barely stand. I will never forget the healing that took place in parts of my life because that very song changed the way I look at my Creator...my Father, my Daddy God. Every time I think of that song and begin to sing it, its difficult not to cry. This is not only a fatherly relationship I had always longed for in my life, it goes far beyond my wildest expectations because it is also the relationship and the intimacy that God the Father desires from us.
Here are the words:
The more I seek you, the more I find you
the more I find you, the more I love you
I want to sit at your feet, drink from the cup in your hand
lay back against you and breathe, feel your heartbeat.
This love is so deep, its more than I can stand
I melt in your peace, its overwhelming
God is calling all of us to this deep intimacy that He so desires with us all. Even though I didn't get that deep intimacy from my biological father that I so desired all these years, I can get so much more from God the Father, that fills every possible void anyone may feel in their lives.
You may be thinking that it is not possible to be intimate with God, but I beg to differ. Whenever I desire to become that intimate with my Heavenly Father I go into my "prayer closet", shut out the world, and shut off all the lights, and climb up into all my pillows, and I go to Him and talk to Him as if I am sitting on His lap. I am not telling Him anything He doesn't already know, but its one thing He desires from all of us. A time set aside just for Him, to worship, to talk, to just be in His presence. So many times I have been guilty of talking about him, or thinking about Him instead of going TO HIM. I pray that this year in 2011 that we will all become more intimate with God. I guarantee it will change your life.
“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. . . that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:38-39 and Ephesians 2:7).
"But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ." (Ephesians 2:13)
Awhile ago a dear friend of mine taught me a song by Kari Jobe. The song is called "The More I Seek You". We were preparing for a prayer conference and to lead praise and worship music at the start of it. One of the songs we did together was this one. I was immediately drawn to the song, and shared so with him. He then told me that it also was a song that struck a chord deeply in his heart. He then shared an intimate story taking him back to when his boys were young and they used to climb on his lap to get some Daddy time. In my heart I began to ache because that was something I always desired with my biological father. It's not that I hadn't ever sat on my fathers lap, but it was the deep father-daughter connection I desired that was lacking with us (due to issues in his own life)...something that has affected my whole life resulting instead in the feelings of rejection and abandonment on certain levels.
After the practice for the conference, that song became ingrained so deeply in my soul that when I went to sleep that night I felt I was still singing it in my spirit...as if I never went gone to sleep, but yet I had. I woke up singing it as well. When the day of the conference came and we sang that particular song, the anointing of the Holy Spirit was so thick on the platform I could barely stand. I will never forget the healing that took place in parts of my life because that very song changed the way I look at my Creator...my Father, my Daddy God. Every time I think of that song and begin to sing it, its difficult not to cry. This is not only a fatherly relationship I had always longed for in my life, it goes far beyond my wildest expectations because it is also the relationship and the intimacy that God the Father desires from us.
Here are the words:
The more I seek you, the more I find you
the more I find you, the more I love you
I want to sit at your feet, drink from the cup in your hand
lay back against you and breathe, feel your heartbeat.
This love is so deep, its more than I can stand
I melt in your peace, its overwhelming
God is calling all of us to this deep intimacy that He so desires with us all. Even though I didn't get that deep intimacy from my biological father that I so desired all these years, I can get so much more from God the Father, that fills every possible void anyone may feel in their lives.
You may be thinking that it is not possible to be intimate with God, but I beg to differ. Whenever I desire to become that intimate with my Heavenly Father I go into my "prayer closet", shut out the world, and shut off all the lights, and climb up into all my pillows, and I go to Him and talk to Him as if I am sitting on His lap. I am not telling Him anything He doesn't already know, but its one thing He desires from all of us. A time set aside just for Him, to worship, to talk, to just be in His presence. So many times I have been guilty of talking about him, or thinking about Him instead of going TO HIM. I pray that this year in 2011 that we will all become more intimate with God. I guarantee it will change your life.
“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. . . that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:38-39 and Ephesians 2:7).
"But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ." (Ephesians 2:13)
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