The most common phrase I hear
people say when someone has dealt with rejection, is when they claim that they "don't care what anyone else
thinks!" Although there could be some truth to this, if we are
honest its not 100% truth. There will always be someone in your life that
you care what they think, whether is be a spouse, parent, child, a best friend
etc.... even if you never admit it to another soul, there is someone in your
life where it matters.
The problem lies when we care too much what people think and begin
to adjust WHO we are to gain some sort of acceptance.
Right now I want you to stop what you are doing and raise your
hand.....if you are breathing, you have dealt with some sort of rejection in
your life. I know that I have. Sometimes the instinct or defense
mechanism of many is to jump quickly and say "not me!" or "I'm
fine, it doesn't matter". The quicker I usually see someone react this
way, usually its the deeper the wound. That defense response, which is
understandable, is "reacting" to protect you from feeling vulnerable,
I get it. The truth is, however, the quickest way to healing and to
move into a life of freedom is to admit that we have all dealt with rejection at
some point in life to some degree.
Lets be honest, rejection hurts. Why? Because
it attacks the very person that you are. It attacks the core of our
self-esteem and attacks who we are and our very purpose in life. It has
to be one of the most common tools that the enemy uses to try to detour the
path that God has laid for our lives in the attempt to try and destroy a
persons life and make them feel worthless. Rejection can cause you to
analyze and question every single person you come across, and their
motives. It can cause you to shut people out before they have even had a
chance. It can also cause you to become extremely needy in your actions,
because deep down...EVERYONE desires to be accepted.
Let me give you some serious TRUTH:
God never intended us to feel rejected, actually the opposite is
true. He CHOSE us. He has a PLAN for our lives with a HOPE and a
FUTURE. He truly desires for you to know exactly WHO you are. He
ACCEPTS, LOVES and APPRECIATES you and wants you to live in the fullness of ALL
that He has for you, a life of FREEDOM. I mean, after all, it is HE that
created you and God doesn't make junk. God's Word tells us that without
being rooted and grounded in the love (and acceptance) of God, that we cannot
experience the fullness that God has for us.
And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:19
Facebook is good for reminding us
of posts from years back through their "Memories" link. I find
it interesting that exactly a year ago today I made a post where I admitted
that I had been struggling with my worth for a couple of days, but finally had
gotten my head out of a fog to recognize Satan's lies for exactly what they
were.....LIES. Rejection is just that, it attacks your worth....it tells
you that you are not worthy.
Rejection has a way of destroying a
persons life in a way that few other things can. The sad thing is that
the number of people affected by rejection is staggering. If we want to
be all that God created us to be, overcoming rejection is essential.
The root of rejection can begin in
an endless amount of ways and result in fruits of unresolved emotional wounds, if not
addressed, can grow and fester into emotional baggage against others, ourselves
and God. A big mistake I see people make A LOT is when rejected by
someone else, a spouse, a friend etc......., they tend to try and run out to
fill that void, the hurt, the empty feeling that left your heart gaping open.
In a quick fix they try to fill it with another person, or fill it with things
to try and feel loved or worthy again - another lie from the enemy. The
truth is that another person or things will never be able to fill that
hole,.....God is the only one that can truly do that. Until we allow Him
to fill that space and heal the broken places, that space will never be fully
filled.
The truth is that we were created
to be loved, accepted, and appreciated. Rejection opposes the very nature that
God created in us. Rejection starves a person from love and acceptance
that they were designed to receive. The problem is that when we turn to
others or even ourselves for that love and acceptance, we are setting ourselves
up for failure and the damage of rejection. Only God can be trusted as
the source of our identity. We are actually loved with the same love that
the Father has for Jesus himself.
John 17:23 I
in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the
world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as You have loved Me.
You will never settle rejection
issues until you get into your spirit that you are LOVED, ACCEPTED AND
APPRECIATED by God. Dealing with religious strongholds is vital to this
process because religion paints God as distant, cold and impersonal. Its
all about RELATIONSHIP. Bringing your relationship with God into proper
perspective is key to overcoming the strongholds of rejection.
Tearing down rejection strongholds
is as simple as receiving, with childlike faith, that what God's Word has to
say about it and your identity is TRUE. That who you are as a new creature in
Christ to a life of purpose and meaning through Jesus Christ.
The Holy Spirit has been faithful to
show me that when we feel the hurt or pain that rejection brings, that it is
because we have placed our identity into what that person thinks of us.
If our identity didn't depend on what others think of us, we would be immune
from the damage of rejection. THIS is why our identity must be based upon
God's Word and what HE says. Are you building your house upon the ROCK or
upon sand?
Wounds of rejection can run deep
and there is no doubt that it can cut to the core especially when its from
someone you trusted or who was close to your heart. I have seen its
effects from the past in my own life. Forgiveness is also key. (I
can hear some of your groans). Forgiving that person who has rejected us
is vital. If we want God's help in the healing process, then forgiveness
is not an option.
I want to encourage you to study
what God says about you in the Bible. I always encourage my friends to write
down the lies they believe about themselves and combat it with a Bible verse of
truth of what God says.
I personally journal daily whatever
is on my heart about anything, but especially when I am struggling with
something. I then find a verse that speaks truth over that
situation. The enemies goal is to fill our head with lies lies
lies.....he desperately wants you to buy in. DON'T DO IT. Instead,
meditate on God's Word and the truth of what He says about you. The enemy
comes to steal kill and destroy by whatever means He can, and getting into your
head is the first step. So fill your head and your heart instead with
true, noble, right, pure and lovely things (Philippians 4:8). Make a
habit of it, do it daily and let TRUTH flow from your heart. Blessings
