Friendship....What is it?

This last weekend, which ended up being a four day weekend for me, went by so fast but it was such a great weekend. I've been wanting to have my closest friends over for awhile, but until volleyball season was done there was just no time. Although I wasn't able to have them all over because of their various, previously planned family activities, I was sure glad some could come. We certainly didn't lack for humor or entertainment. Next time we will get us ALL together. :)

I began to think (which is typical Jen), and reflect on what makes these people so special to me.....I could name a million things easily.  A couple of them I knew immediately upon meeting them that there was an immediate bond of friendship almost before words were spoken. Some I've spent years and years knowing and bonding. Some I've known approx.5-10 years and one of my closest and dearest, for only 2 years this fall, and another for 2 in December. It's not the amount of years though that matters to me in any of these friendships.  It's not even the gender of some, and I hear a lot of flack over that from people....but I laugh, because even my own husband has no issues because he knows my full heart on the matter,  so what others think or have to say is irrelevant to me. 

When I think on these people, there is a huge bond of trust.  It's a trust I've NEVER had to question. It's a trust that gives freedom of being able to be 100% me...no masks, pretending, no filters...just me. If that means me furiously angry, me hysterically freaking out,  me bawling my eyes out with snot dripping and make up down my face, or me jumping up and down, unrestrained peeing my pants laughing me....it's all ok. I've never had to force my way into their lives, it was an easy fit.  These people have been there not just in word but in truth AND deed.....even when it was hard. Some have had to talk me down or slap me with hard realities. They've held my hand or wiped my tears and fervently prayed for me at times I just couldn't find the words. They've cheered me on and reminded me of the song in my heart when I couldn't remember what I'd been singing.   The beauty in it all.....is that I've had the blessing of doing the same for them at various times, even if it was just a moment. They will all tell you that I'm an emotional, living out loud,  deep thinker and feeler of things,  but it's not just things about my own life but about theirs as well. When I'm in a friendship I know God has placed there clearly, and purposefully, make no mistake...I'm IN IT FULLY. They became family, and a girl STANDS with them, behind them, and often in front of them to protect, when that IS needed. 

I have lots of people I call friends, but only a handful of friends in my entire life that I consider family. This is not by accident but for such a time as this. For a super exciting time that God has a purpose and plan laid out long before any of us ever saw the womb. 

I talk a lot about my friendships. I value them deeply. They've taught me a ton about what true friendship is. It's a beautiful rarity, a treasure from God. We have, all of us, so much in common, but mostly it's a deep burning passion to run where the Lord is calling us relentlessly, and knowing that is truly all that matters....HIM. It's an understanding that our lives are created not about us, but about Him.  When the race gets tough, we are there to scream to each other,  "suck it up cupcake", to "you can do it" to "I'm so proud of you", to "love you",  and packing punches that will knock the T right off the word can't reminding us we CAN.  

It's taken me years to understand the true meaning of REAL RAW friendship and I am still learning...endlessly learning. 

Most of all I'm thankful that God looked at me and said "because I love you, I'm putting these amazing people in your life because they are part of the beautiful big picture". I am truly BEYOND blessed. 

Trying to Limit Conception

     In my job I get the blessing of teaching students both health and scientific facts.  I’m kind of a science and health geek because I love learning and teaching about the cool creation that God has made in the human body.

   Recently I read an article about how the body reacts to stress.  When couples are trying to conceive, stress makes it very difficult to do so for various reasons.

As I began to think on this, as I am finished having children, I thought that this information did not pertain to me, but yet I realize it does.  The Lord began to speak to me about my own life.  Here, in the last two weeks, I have been waking up at night 2 or 3 times sometimes with something on my mind….stressors. 

 My volleyball team just competed in Semi-state so I assumed it was that in all its excitement, but that competition was last weekend, and it still happening.  I then had to start looking at WHAT I was thinking of when I woke.  I have been thinking on things of the future.  I have a daughter who is now at 15, seeking out colleges and coaches because she has plans to play volleyball in a few years in college.  I’ve been worrying (although I know we are not supposed to), about where she will go, and although I have been able to save some money for college, it will not be near enough, so wondering how we are going to pay for it.  I have been thinking about the sudden items breaking down in our house that need repair,  or how I am going to get kids to this or that...etc... The list seems endless to me, but lately its been waking me up in the night, which should not be. 

 God does not want us to worry.  365 times in the Bible, is says “Do Not Fear”…this includes worry.  When we worry, we are not walking in faith.  Fear and faith cannot be in the same place.   Stress can cause infertility physically but can also cause us to not be able to conceive in the Spirit.  It is very difficult to conceive when you are in stress, fear or anxiety.  Stress is not a good breeding ground for miracles to be conceived.  It also makes it very difficult to hear His voice when all you hear are the thoughts of anxiety buzzing around.  His voice is heard best in peace and not in  “Chaotic Crazyville”.  God is a God of peace.

Stress is a tool that we hand right to the devil when we open the door to those thoughts – I am guilty.  He takes it and runs with it and wreaks havoc in our lives if we let him.  When he attacks, stress and anxiety comes, and fear comes.  We then begin to seek God out of desperation and not faith.  As long as we allow it to remain, it will be difficult to hear God and even more difficult to conceive the possible miracle that we need.

I find it interesting that reproductive systems in both humans and animals may shut down during times of stress and that the LAST thing the enemy wants is for a Christian to "reproduce", especially if they are ON FIRE for God.  If he can keep you in stress, he can keep you from spreading the Word and getting others born again or bringing others out of bondage and into freedom because they have heard Gods truth and experience revelation in their own lives.  If we are caught up in our own kingdom with stress, we cannot begin to help build Gods. 

There is no doubt that when attacks come it is extremely difficult to NOT be stressed, to not feel pressure of the attack.  Its difficult, but not impossible.

For me this was revelation knowledge that God brought into my mind.  When I know the enemy’s tactics, it helps me a lot.  Knowing that he is trying to keep me from conceiving what God has for me helps me.  Knowledge alone will help me recognize and overcome.  When I came to this realization I actually laughed out loud and thought "I dont think so devil!!"    I am not surprised at these attacks, as I am stepping into a new season, along awaited one, and I KNOW God has big plans for this season.

Isaiah 26:3 says that God will keep us in perfect peace when our mind is stayed upon Him. 

 He has done this in many times in my life, I have watched it over and over.  The problem occurs when we take our minds off of Him and lose focus while the enemy is breathing his stanky breath in our ears.  God, however, is the author of peace.  Jesus is the author and finisher of your faith.  If God is for us, who can be against us?  The enemy could not stop Him from reproducing and he can’t stop us either, if we stay in peace.  Keep your mind off the battle and on God, He will do the fighting for you. 

Obsession and The "F Word"

I, by nature, am an over-thinker. Sometimes its because I can't get my mind to shut off and another is because I am choosing to dissect things.  I am a true science geek at heart with a little bit of psychology thrown in the mix as I try to not only understand myself but those around me.
After having a conversation with one of my best friends, where we had briefly talked about the word "obsession" and it affects, I began to think more and more about that word, its meanings, and its root.  
Websters defines it as:
 "To preoccupy or fill the mind of (someone) continually, intrusively, and to a troubling extent."

   In the world people are obsessed with money, people, things, fame, health, exercise, and a plethora of other things......., If we are honest, we are all probably obsessed with something in our lives.  I can tell you honestly that in my life I have struggled with being obsessed with my schedule and getting things done or being on time.  I have gotten much better over the last few years but I catch myself being that way at times.
I like to break things down and think about where they start....maybe I am "obsessed" with understanding people.  ha ha.  The definition talks about "becoming preoccupied or filling the mind", so at some point it begins with a thought or even a fantasy...a need that maybe we are trying to fill.  If this is the case, then in our minds, we must have felt a type of lack, or a fear of coming into lack.  Fear is a HUGE key here.  If I am speaking of my own life, my "obsession" with time and scheduling appears because I hate to be late.  The reason I hate to be late is because I do not want to miss out on something like time with family, friends or participating in an activity...valuable time.  Something in my life I deem very precious because one never knows when time is going to run out.
So again the root - FEAR...that "F word" again.  
If we are obsessed with things, or obsessed with someone, you have to ask yourself WHY?  I guarantee that if you trace it down to the root....its that "F word" Fear again.  
What is it that we are afraid of?   Fear is a tricky thing that in the long run can rob you of so very much in your life.  I like to use the "3 D's" to describe it.
Fear destroys, distorts, and discourages.    So much damage is already done before we even realize it.  That is the enemy's goal..."to steal kill and destroy" as stated in John 10:10.  He wants to kill your focus, steal your time and destroy your relationships.....that IS what obsession does.
The enemy WANTS you to be in fear of LACK, but what does the Bible say about lack?
I love these verses:  

Deuteronomy 2:7 "For the LORD your God has blessed you in all that you have done; He has known your wanderings through this great wilderness These forty years the LORD your God has been with you; you have not lacked a thing."'

James 1:4 
Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.


The Bible says so much more but I do love these verses.  God provides all we need, so if there is lack, or fear of it, God says we lack for nothing.  
He has also given us all we need and promises to supply all of our needs according
 to Philippians 4:19. 
If you are finding that you are dealing with obsession, trace it back and address the fear.  It is not God that gives us the spirit of fear, that instead comes from the enemy.  God gives us one of power and of love and of a sound mind according to 2 Timothy 1:7.  
I am NOT promoting obsession by any means, but if we are to be obsessed with anything, God wants us to be obsessed with Him.  We should be obsessed with hearing His voice and His direction and in fear of having things in our lives that keep us from hearing Him clearly.  If your focus is THOSE things and those alone, all else should fall into place and the need to obsess about anyone or anything is irrelevant.  Blessings